Lets face it, that feeling is no fun – the feeling of someone saying NO. No to our products, No to opportunity, no to US. It is probably one of THE main reasons people fail in this business. And there is very viable reason why people say no these days. They are accosted with so much information, so many messages out there asking them for their money, their time, their attention. I know if I had someone come up to me in a store or out at Starbucks, I’m instantly on guard. People know that “friendly” means that someone wants something from them.
So how do we get past this? How do we not only make it easier for ourselves and our team members that we mentor to move past the FEAR of the icky rejection scene but also make it apparent to people we wish to prospect that we are not THAT person?
Well, I have been in network marketing a LONG time. I hate even bringing it up – but hey I started when I was 17 so take that into consideration please With over cough cough 20 years of experience, I’ve come up with some basic truths about how to deal with the fear of rejection.
The Bossy Redhead’s 7 Tips for Overcoming the Fear of Rejection:
1. Realize who you are. What does that mean? It means, know that you are an awesome person, that you are worthy of friends, worthy of business, worthy of money. When you are secure in yourself, then you will not fear rejection as much. That doesn’t mean you have to like it, but it doesn’t sting like it would if you feel a lack of confidence. If this is an issue for you – then you really need to back up and start with YOU. That means getting a personal growth program like Personal Power (Tony Robbins), a mentor or coach, or just even some therapy to help you feel your worth.
2. Recruit with a buddy. I found this to be SUCH a valuable tool when I first started out and I like to pair my new team members up with a buddy in the beginning so that they have a partner to work with. For some reason, if you are out with someone else and you are told “NO” it isn’t a big deal. You have someone to validate that it just wasn’t a good time or good fit for that prospect. Sometimes if someone is downright nasty, you can find a sense of humor about it more easily with a buddy.
3. Make it a game. You can do this whether you prospect online or in person. This works particularly well with a buddy – set a number of people you will meet for the day and then make a game of getting nos. Say to yourself “I bet I can get 10 people to say no to me by 11AM.” Do you see what this does? It makes you WANT a “NO.” If you have a contest with your success partner – you two can race and see who gets 10 Nos first. What happens is that you get some yeses in there – but because you’ve bet on 10 – you have to keep going. Do you see how this can help with your work ethic? A LOT of people stop prospecting for the day when they get a YES. They are excited and pat themselves on the back and then kick back the rest of the day. This is a BIG No-No if you are telling yourself and your team that you are leader. You simply must keep working consistently each day.
4. Remember, the FEAR is not the rejection. That means that most of the time, the anticipation of being rejected is FAR worse than the actual rejection. People are generally not mean. Just because someone says “No Thanks” to your business or products doesn’t mean they don’t like YOU. This is why once you get in the habit of getting the “NOs” you really don’t fear it any more…and the FEAR is what generally holds people back. Sure, some people just are not nice – but you also don’t know what is happening in that person’s life. Usually if someone is rude or mean, they have something going on in their life. Maybe they have a sick loved one, or serious financial issues and they can’t even fathom spending money on something. Have a heart for the people who are particularly rude to you – they need a little love.
5. Don’t Meet People With Your Business In Mind. This is particularly helpful if you are shy or introverted. If I said to you – just go and meet 2 new people and get their email address – without talking about your products or your business opportunity, could you do it? I think just about anyone could do this. A lot of what holds people back is that they go out with their business in mind and all they can think about is how they can sell something to this prospect or how they can ask for a meeting to discuss the “opportunity.” Stop. Go and make friends. Period. That is really the single best advice I can give you. Go and make new friends. Ask them about who they are, what they want. I guarantee you, the more people you make friends with, the more people will want to know about what you are doing and how they can join you.
6. Use Micro Goals. Don’t start out saying “I’m going to talk to 20 people today.” I always tell the people just starting out – or even those that have been doing network marketing for a while but without a lot of success, to just take it down to the smallest possible goal. For example, take it day by day – and at the start of the day – make it your goal to talk to just TWO new people. And I mean just TALK. Then when you have that down, you can make it your goal to add in the requirments that actually make someone a lead: a phone number and email address.
7. You have to want it bad enough. Let me ask you a question: Are you just “trying this thing out?” When you signed up for your network marketing company – did you use language like “I’ll give it a try.” or.. “It seems like a good opportunity.” This is going to seem harsh…but if this is how you feel, you might as well quit now. Rejection WILL get the better of you if your level of commitment is that low. You have to approach your business with an unrelenting attitude of “Whatever it takes.” If you had a family member that was sick and needed 100,000 to get treatment in order to live, would you do whatever it takes to get that money? Would you CARE if someone said no to you? You wouldn’t even have the time to think about a “no.” Get your mindset in the right place. Be RELENTLESS. You will see how little the fear of rejection is a factor in your world.
I hope these tips have been helpful. The key is you have to take the journey to get to your destination. Some parts are pretty bumpy, but if you keep putting one foot in front of the other without fail, you will find one day you have achieved your dreams.
Bossy Redhead OUT!
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